parenting

Hostess is a bougie white yoga lady. They're not gonna have pizza but "homemade hummus and salmon spread" and apple pie, and healthy cake lmao. No booze.

Lady my kid eats chicken nuggets... Barely

Starts at one and ends "whenever" and they've already told some of the kids there will be s'mores as the finish for "the second half"

Also it's hot as fuck, no breeze, and I am hungover.

Family this is violence.

I thought we all understood that these things were OBLIGATIONS that we endured for the sake of our kids. You scratch my back, I scratch yours, nobody goes a birthday with no guests. But the agreement is thus: you get three hours between noon and 3PM, there is an activity, you serve kid friendly snacks or pizza, cake and everyone leaves. This isn't a kids birthday party, it's performative bullshit. It's a hostage situation.

My wife asked the hostess if we should feed our kids if the expectation is that we will be there for, you know, 7 hours.

The response was, "I would say, go ahead and eat, but come ready to eat more"

What are you the fucking sphinx lol I can't even