DW! It get's better in the mid 30's. When you realize you don't want to stress yourself anymore. You have your career already set up. No need to prove yourself, like back in school. You can start enjoying your life and care less.

[–] Jesus_666@lemmy.world 17 points 12 hours ago (4 children)

Then you get into a relationship and feel your partner's disappointment every day because it turns out that while you have gotten comfortable with how your brain works, the rest of the world hasn't. But don't worry; tomorrow is the day when it'll all get better...

[–] n3cr0@lemmy.world 5 points 10 hours ago (1 children)

And then the cycle repeats. You try to comfort a society holding on to neurotypical values. You haven't learned to accept yourself. You keep working against your nature and you still hate yourself for failing.

[–] Jesus_666@lemmy.world 5 points 10 hours ago

That's my point. Being at peace with yourself only works until you have to regularly deal with someone who isn't. Of course you can isolate yourself from those people if they fail to adapt but that means you get to choose between being in a relationship and feeling tension over your neurodivergence on the one side and being alone but at peace with yourself on the other.

I'm not saying that you can't make a satisfying choice but it certainly ain't an easy one. If you get a partner who meshes well with your brain, congratulations. But a lot of people don't.

Also, making a choice about your relationship means making a choice that affects two people (or more if you're poly or have a dependent). And sometimes you can't in good conscience end a relationship because you know that doing so will majorly screw over your partner.

Life is complicated. Inner peace is a precious and fragile good and sometimes you trade that good away. Appreciate it if and while you have it.

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