[Migrated, see pinned post] Casual Conversation

3363 readers

1 users here now

We moved to !casualconversation@piefed.social please look for https://lemm.ee/post/66060114 in your instance search bar

Share a story, ask a question, or start a conversation about (almost) anything you desire. Maybe you'll make some friends in the process.

RULES

Be respectful: no harassment, hate speech, bigotry, and/or trolling.
Encourage conversation in your OP. This means including heavily implicative subject matter when you can and also engaging in your thread when possible.
Avoid controversial topics (e.g. politics or societal debates).
Stay calm: Don’t post angry or to vent or complain. We are a place where everyone can forget about their everyday or not so everyday worries for a moment. Venting, complaining, or posting from a place of anger or resentment doesn't fit the atmosphere we try to foster at all. Feel free to post those on !goodoffmychest@lemmy.world
Keep it clean and SFW
No solicitation such as ads, promotional content, spam, surveys etc.

Casual conversation communities:

Related discussion-focused communities

founded 2 years ago

MODERATORS

orangeNgreen@lemmy.world

neidu2@feddit.nl

BoozeOrWater@lemm.ee

Men who are Sensitive AND Expressive, how do you cope? (lemmy.world)

submitted 1 year ago by PlanetOfOrd@lemmy.world to c/casualconversation@lemm.ee

26 comments fedilink hide all child comments

I'm definitely a sensitive man. Like most sensitive men, I definitely find it challenging in the "yeah, you gotta eat 50 lb of bacon, pump iron 7x a day, never smile, and always take on a challenge" world of masculinity. I mean, we've definitely come a long way over the last decade making emotions something men can accept, but we got a long way to go.

Most articles I read about sensitive men are mostly about hiding it, how we're not supposed, to, and then when we do we'll feel better, blah blah blah. But I'm already expressive. I find it challenging, from both men and women.

From men, I don't feel like a man (I don't mean in the sexual sense...just from a psychological sense). In men's groups I get so tired of talking about work and (maybe) hobbies I just wanna run out of the room screaming. It's hard to find any other men who are okay talking about their feelings. When I do (I'm not afraid to), I find no one is able to relate.

From women, I think they often want to see me as a stereotypical stoic man. So when I do express myself, I'm seen as "not manly," which can be a turnoff, whether for romance or friendship.

So how do other sensitive men cope with expressing their feelings?

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments

[–] stoy@lemmy.zip 8 points 1 year ago

I am 37, and I use these rules to try and live by:

"I am man enough to cry when I need to."

"The only requirement for being an adult is to know when it is appropriate to be childish"

I have stopped caring about if others look down on me for being sensitive, crying is an amazing way of clearing your head when you are emotional, a few years ago I got double flat feet, double heel spurs and a bad knee at the same time, when walking home from the bus after work, every single step I took hurt a lot, even after eating painkillers.

I cried openly and hard while blasting Sabaton in my headphones, and all of that gave the energy to keep going.

As an IT guy I find that my greatest strength is in my sensitive side, I pick up on stuff faster than others, and can help users in a more relatable way making what I tell them last longer.