michifmischief

joined 4 months ago

Yes, I am doing better. I have much more stability, and many things to look forward to these days. Thank you for your worry!

[–] michifmischief@lemmygrad.ml 16 points 2 days ago (5 children)

I was working full time, three dollars above minimum wage, all day manual labour in like 25-30° celsius, and still not affording food. I ate what I could, and was deeply miserable. And always painful and tired. I did what I had to in the hardest times to eat. My rent was about $700 below market for similar units. My phone bill was cheap. BUT GOD FORBID I care for two senior cats. Neither need medicine, I just pay for food and litter and ever year or so a new set of toys. I never missed a beat for them. Vet visits and all.

And still, I was being told to leave behind my cats. My $80 a month cats. I nearly screamed, "That's like saying stop drinking coffee at Starbucks".

Meanwhile I was walking through the financial district to go to my grueling job looking at the wasted half eaten take out. If even one person had just given me their uneaten half from the garbage I'd never go hungry.

I thought every day of killing myself. But my cats needed me. And I was being told I could afford to eat if I just gave them up. My whole world. Why eat with no reason to go on?

I left that job suddenly and used every favour and the pathetic social security to get by before beginning my new grueling job which pays ever so slightly more. I nearly lost my apartment. I'd stay up all night waiting for the sheriff to knock on my door. I became paranoid, I had delusions, I barely slept many days.

And this kind of thing happens everyday to thousands and thousands of people in my capitalist country. Children. Elders. I work with kids now and they tell me harrowing things. Their teachers equally so. Programs cut now weekly by our feds.

Redditors see stories like these and think, "too bad, budget harder".

[–] michifmischief@lemmygrad.ml 10 points 1 week ago

My job has been hard on my body lately and I'm so tired from the long commute. But I use the time to read and scroll Lemmy. It's very encouraging. makes me want to keep reading even when I'm getting confused and have to go back several times.

 

All the sources I can find are Wikipedia and American news sources. There's a death toll estimate between 250,000 and 1,000,000 which is a flag for me to question if anyone at all can confirm an information.

The question comes from a conversation with my mother who confidently stated that Stalin killed so many on the Road of Bones, she'd seen it on a BBC show.