Meow

Using "licking balls" as an insult is misogynist and/or homophobic, don't do that.

Sorry, I don't (yet) speak Chinese, I love the song for it's feel, ya know.

The key for me has been to combine the two, it isn't that the light must defeat the dark, like in Christian "good and evil" culture, but that the light and dark must work together, the light illuminates the path, and the dark has the experience and strength to weird the sword in defense of humanity, the dark alone cannot see the foe to strike, and may only see shadows that are bigger than what is real, the light alone only knows how to live in the light, and cannot handle the dangers ahead, only together can one see things through, the fight exists within us just as it exists without, growing up in this environment our minds have been colonized and must be decolonized before we can advance our fight past ourselves into one of solidarity with those who have reached the stage to do so, Marxist Leninist Dialectical and Historical Materialism applies to the human mind just as it does everything else in nature for it is how reality itself even works, even space/time is in a dialectical relationship with each other. This has all been most relevant to me on a deep level, the trauma that split my mind made an injury within me that only this path can heal.

I've been listening to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXfIQ9jAzj4 I used ytDownloader to rip the audio and have it sitting on my Desktop to listen to daily.

I think this is one of the lessons China learned for the fall of the USSR, that you can't just "make" the revolution happen before they are ready to happen themselves, or you spread yourself thin, and so the Chinese have the saying "an egg cracked from the outside is breakfast, and egg cracked from inside is new life", the people have to be ready for revolution, the conditions must be ripe for it, and they must be willing and able to defend it themselves even after winning it, and then China does provide help, like with the aid they send to countries being brutalized, including even non Socialist countries when it makes sense, like for example aid they've sent to Iran.

Thanks, I probably need to read that, the PDF I have is only 10 pages so I slapped it onto my desktop to read next, oh by the way if anyone else wants to read it here is the prolewiki link: https://en.prolewiki.org/index.php?title=Library%3AOn_revolutionary_morality&oldid=75847

I am not aware of how I am treating it like gospel (perhaps because my childhood trauma had to do with religion and set me like a fire against it, I don't understand "gospel" in the first place), my fears and paranoia are not related to Theory in that way, thanks to the conditions of my mental health and trauma and life difficulties and so on, all before I ever read anything, so that error had more to do with my fear and paranoia mental patterns popping up and taking over without me realizing I was, and so became primary and attempts to make sure I wasn't messing up in some way by remember Theory I've read, secondary, other comments were more helpful.

This thread has made me realize, while my main thinking for trying to actually talk to people online was to fight social anxiety so I could do more in real life too, it seems it also gives opportunity to practice self improvement as a Communist as well, thanks.

I thought I was avoiding that by focusing on just the icon and banner, but I realize now that I may have been ingauging in another form of liberalism by trying to treat the icon and banner in isolation in the first place, as things only make sense within the context of how they interrelate with other things, not taken in isolation.

Thank you for your criticism, I will try to learn from this.

Maybe, sometimes my paranoia can get the best of me, so I must remain careful of that about myself, even so, every time I look at that symbol my "fight or flight" response goes crazy, sometimes ones instincts protects oneself, sometimes it gets in the way.

Edit: I think I figured something out about it, rather than it being the use of fascist symbols it might be the other way around, that fascists are co opting nature symbols as a part of their reactionary thinking, as reactionary thinking is that which is in support of going backwards, of stopping the new thing, that they would cling to old symbolism, but Native Americans are still behind the oppressive wall of colonialism in the US, so what is reactionary for a fascist, may actually be progressive for a Native American.

I haven't read much about US colonialism and Native Americans yet (the result of my bad coping mechanism that makes me want to run away from horrors close to home, and preference to learn about nicer things far away, like China), or else I might have known sooner.

Dam, I gotta get around to reading that one, looks really good. I've got it as a pdf sitting in a big folder full of based resources, but I've got such a backlog to go through. I've got to get myself to stop procrastinating so much, I wont be satisfied if I don't read it all, it is like my own brain is in a constant state of fighting itself and I'm certain somewhere in all of this Theory lies the key to finally getting it to stop infighting, I just haven't found more than hints yet.