Several years ago I took my first trip out of the country. We started in the UK and then took the tunnel to France.

I did not at the time speak a single word of French. I'd had almost no exposure to the language.

On the ride between London and Paris it hit me that I had no plan for how to navigate in a place where I did not speak the language.

There was a thrill that accompanied the risk. It's hard to explain exactly what that emotion was, a, because I'm also autistic and my emotional vocabulary is stunted to put it simply, and 2, because I've never felt that exact way in any other circumstance.

It's the first thing that comes to mind when you ask about feeling fully alive. "How are we gonna do this omg what are we gonna do, what have we gotten ourselves in to???" It's not going to be the same for everyone. It's an ambitious question, probably intentionally ambiguous. It's the type of thing that autistic people, in my experience, have difficulty exploring.

I've done a decent bit of travelling and felt great joy during those experiences, but the one moment that jumped to mind when reading this thread is from my teenage years.

My first relationship was online and after about a year of long distance we met in person. I flew over and stayed with her family for a few days. I can only describe the emotion I felt as pure euphoria, distilled and undiluted. I'd never tried any drugs but for those few days (and especially the first) it felt like I was both high and in a dream. I've tried to speak about this feeling of euphoria before but I think people always assume I'm talking about sex when that's not the case at all. It was a mixture of anxiety and elation and like a daydream had come to life.

The come down (if it can be called that?) was not quite as intense but hit hard too. For a couple days after returning home I kept questioning if it had all been a dream.

I've never had an experience like that since and I'm not sure I ever will.

I don't know if it counts as feeling "fully alive" but it's what came to mind.

Disclaimer: I do not have an official diagnosis, I just strongly suspect I may be on the moderate side of the spectrum, which has been confirmed by the tests I took so far.

Had a couple of years in Uni when I played bass in two bands - blues/rock and jazzy covers. The entire "musician" experience, for me, was the point where life made sense. I would call it the moment of feeling alive in the sense that the whole context encouraged me to be as present and as 'in the now' as I've ever been. Used to lose myself in the music and the friendships, even concert preps were engaging. Guess the whole planning, gear handling, and the set-up itself tickled me in a certain way.

Surprisingly, even my relatively pronounced agoraphobic side sort of calmed down during that period (although, admittedly, the fact that I took Theatre and acting as my Majors may have had an immense impact on that, too).

like when im kinda daydreaming on uni, i think so this is the thing i waiting for, in the end its feel good study, or when i feel love, but i feel it like a few times in my life, i feel like life has some meaning and i could just relax and go through my life, knowing like tomorrow is going to be the same day that today but not worrying about it, that i have in control everything and that im surrounded by the correct people. but honestly i feel like i can have a friend, but i wish i could have someone to love, to say my deepest feelings and he could understand me, that he or she was in the place for me, i dont know how to express that, not in a dependency relationship but that i can like a real beautiful life. but unfortunately that person hasn't come and also this communication problem that i can say anything almost my feelings lol

I think for me it's this feeling when I am completely relaxed, no obligations in my mind, no stress, no sensory or physical discomfort. Last time I felt it was on a nice warm spring day, lying in a hammock in the garden, reading a book and having a gentle warm breeze flowing over me. That felt so nice, so real.