cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/48778576

I cant help but recognize patterns in certain things, i have jumped into some rabbit hole i know i will never be able to climb out of now, many of these truths are something you think only a crazy person would believe, i dont believe im crazy, but i mean, shit dude... idk anymore. Like, iv lost some "friends" over this, but cutting those Hylics off was probably better for me anyway. Iv lost pretty much everyone, im tired of saying "i enjoy my solitude" the truth is that im just a lonely bastard, i cant connect with people, i cant stand talking to these golems who have no nuance, black and white thing, who only react to thier thoughless emotions. I find myself feeling as though i am talking to a meat husk than an actual conscious living soul. I dont want to talk about the current thing, i dont want to do whatever everyone is doing, i dont want to conform to your idea of what is acceptable and tolerable. You have no soul, you have no true principles or values and morals, they dont even practice thier religion wholeheartedly. Every opportunity to climb that social ladder, to be liked, to bask in the acceptance of other soulless idiots. They are the majority of the population, and they are mostly responsible for all the evil in this world. Even so, i wavering, even though i know this, im so lonely i sometimes am willing to ignore this to have some kind of companionship. Im not sure if im strong enough for this. I hope when i post this, i csn breath better.