this post was submitted on 16 Jan 2026
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The Shitpost Office

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[–] Diplomjodler3@lemmy.world 10 points 2 months ago (1 children)

I'll do it for ten million!

[–] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Thats cheap, id do it for a million.

[–] 0_o7@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 months ago

Never underestimate your true worth.

I'd do it for 500,000

[–] ZombieCyborgFromOuterSpace@piefed.ca 7 points 2 months ago (4 children)

Let's say you won the lottery. What would YOU do with one billion dollars?

I'd help my community. I'd open a grocery co-op chain in my province (Quebec) where the goal is to really offer the best price for food, not profit. It would be run by the people in the communities where the stores are.

I'd also buy a bunch of apartment bidding where tenants were victims of removictions, turn it into a housing co-op and contact the evicted tenants and give them back their apartment.

Co-ops everywhere!

And I'd also house the homeless in my city. 

[–] AlecSadler@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 2 months ago (1 children)

House homeless. Improve mental health services. Drug rehabilitation programs.

The grocery co-op idea is awesome.

Affordable housing.

I'd also fund parades and other community events around equality and diversity, and I'd make them regular things until all the local racist bigots get so fed up they want to leave...and then I'd provide bare minimum moving assistance to them to GTFO.

[–] ZombieCyborgFromOuterSpace@piefed.ca 3 points 2 months ago (1 children)

Oh! Fund spaces for the arts! Band practice studios, arts and craft studios, etc.

[–] AlecSadler@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 months ago

Deal. Ask me again in 3-5 years.

[–] WorldsDumbestMan@lemmy.today 2 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

First, endless health treatments for myself, obviously, along with a few things I could not enjoy before, a powerful, solar-powered server room, and the best education and coaches I can get.

After that, I split time between building a strong community, focused on pulling each-other up to the point where we are independent of the main system, and I would fund a few TinkTanks, like the other billionaires.

I would start to strategicaly carve out entire cities, focusing on solar contracts (renewable/green kits, focused on anti-consumption and maintanability). I would also fund business ventures, because if I drive myself broke doing this, I lose power.

EDIT: Explanations:

The server room is to just experiment with AI, try to reach a singularity point if possible, use it as a research device if not. With the right framework, it can just funnel knowledge for me to learn, in a certain format.

"Carving out entire cities":

I would focus on small towns, viages, cities, and convince people to go full green kit. These cities would be living advertisments to anyone who passes through, motivating people to switch to those systems.

I would secretly force extra tools into the kit that aren't needed, but can serve as weapons, for when TPTB try to force citizens to give up their new lifestyle.

[–] diffaldo@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 2 months ago

Id join politics and fund political movements.

[–] JadenSmith@sh.itjust.works 1 points 2 months ago

Id buy a hotel. Remodel all the rooms as somewhat longer than temporary accommodation. I will hire good professionals, from organisers to medical teams, to work together for the goal of rehabilitating people without homes. Dealing with issues from mental health to health overall, before building skills to help them fly.

The idea would be a massive scale homeless shelter with actual help provided.

[–] 7toed@midwest.social 4 points 2 months ago

Finally, I get to be in a K hole in the whitehouse

[–] robocall@lemmy.world 0 points 2 months ago (1 children)
[–] ThoGot@feddit.org 11 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

It's basically the opposite of "money doesn't make you happy"

i.e. being poor is the only thing keeping you from being happy