this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2026
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depression_now!

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Last year, I had 2 OD attempts. Couldn't do a third because my mom found out and hid my pills, but this ain't this post's focus.

Waking up after a failed suicide attempt has a... eerie feeling. I can't really describe it, but you feel weird after it.

Just wanted to share a thought.

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[–] polariscap@lemmy.cafe 2 points 4 hours ago

I know many who woke up after attempting suicide. In every case I’m so glad they stayed here. A few have passed away by now but in different circumstances (old age, others). I know I’m just a nobody in the fediverse but I’m glad you’re here.

[–] BitchPeas@lemmy.world 4 points 7 hours ago

Heard. Hugs.

[–] Deconceptualist@leminal.space 4 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (1 children)

Aw, hope you're doing far better. Depression is deeply unfair, and in my limited experience I hate how it masks itself as clarity or certainty.

I'm a bit morbidly curious about this feeling you highlight, if you're willing to describe further. Is it weird like any these? Total guesses on my part, no intent to be insensitive so apologies if any come across that way.

    1. "I shouldn't be here"
    1. "Am I dead/dreaming?"
    1. "Am I still me? / Is the world still the same?"
    1. Drugs still in your system / everything hazy or woozy
    1. Some conflicting combination of "Fuck, I'm still here / Yay, I'm still here"
    1. Disappointment
    1. Relief
    1. Disassociation or out-of-body feeling
    1. Ennui

EDIT: Added numbers

[–] MeowerMisfit817@lemmy.world 4 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

A mix of 1, 4, "fuck, I'm still here", 6, and 8.

[–] Deconceptualist@leminal.space 2 points 13 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (1 children)

Interesting, thanks. But damn, I'm sorry life has let you down so completely.

I don't expect you to believe me, but not all places and times are shitty. Some are pretty good even. If you can get enough distance between yourself and your current situation, you might find better options than ending it all.

Of course, if your own body is the main source of misery, that's pretty hard to escape so that's awful and I understand.

[–] MeowerMisfit817@lemmy.world 2 points 8 hours ago

Well, my body is ONE of the issues. My family isn't also the best one, and I'm still - 18, so moving is NOT a option. People can also be jerks most of times.

[–] Big_Boss_77@lemmynsfw.com 4 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (1 children)

Care to elaborate?

Meaning like what goes through your head, what is the thought process, that sort of thing.

[–] MeowerMisfit817@lemmy.world 6 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

It's hard to describe, you're always with it on your mind and... Feels wrong to be up after that, like, "Damn, I almost died yesterday".

[–] Big_Boss_77@lemmynsfw.com 2 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

Does that stick with you? Does it change the way things look? Or just a "Well damn..." scenario and things go right back to how they were?

[–] MeowerMisfit817@lemmy.world 1 points 14 hours ago

Just one day thinking "Damn", and following the next ones as if nothing happened.

[–] DaMummy@hilariouschaos.com 3 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Like, post suicide clarity? It's not something you wonna chase, is it?

[–] MeowerMisfit817@lemmy.world 1 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

I don't really understand the second part of your comment, but yeah, like a clarity. But it just lasted one day.

[–] DaMummy@hilariouschaos.com 2 points 12 hours ago

For the first part, people do chase that, so I'm asking if you would gets an addictive feeling to it, and want to replace it. And for the record, please don't. Hard for me to tell you otherwise, and yes, the world is going to shit, but it's not because of people like you, and we can't afford to lose another.