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The original was posted on /r/amitheasshole by /u/NoRegret6013 on 2023-07-27 13:08:20+00:00.

I’m pretty sure I already know who’s the asshole but…My (20f) boyfriend (21m) have been together for 4 years. We broke up last year for a few months since we are so young and haven’t experienced much outside of our relationship, however this brought us closer together. We worked through most of our issues, except for where we want to attend church. Faith is important to both of us, I was born and raised catholic and he was born and raised nondenominational. While I don’t think the Catholic Church is the church for me, it’s a huge part of my family’s life. My bf has never been a fan of the Catholic Church, which I understand but he has no respect for my family’s s beliefs. We both agreed that we would leave our family’s churches and find one that suits us better however, I still at times go with his family to church but he refuses to have anything to do with my family’s faith. My family isn’t trying to convert him or anything but it would be nice if he had more respect for their beliefs. He and I both agreed we would not attend at the Catholic Church as the doctorine doesn’t align with our beliefs. This past weekend my grandma (who is nearly 90) asked me if I would go to a visiting European choir concert at our local parish. I thought this would be a great way to spend time with my grandma and I knew it would be a special memory because it’s not often that large European singing groups come to our small town. And since my grandpa use to be in a traveling choir and he passed away 3 years ago, I new that this was special to my grandma. I agreed to take her and told my bf I was excited. His whole demeanor changed. He argued with me in front of his sister, saying that “we agreed to never go there again” but I told him “it was a just a choir concert, it’s not like I’m going to mass”. He claimed that because it was a Catholic choir at the Catholic church that it didn’t matter and I was in the wrong. I told him it wasn’t my fault for his lack of clarification and it wasn’t fair that this was an issue when we still attend church with his family. I explained to him why this was special for my grandma and he didn’t care and said “plan something else with her”. I even offered that after this, if my grandma offered a plan like this again I would turn it down or suggest something else. The argument resulted in him threatening to end things, and while I know that is toxic and manipulative I still gave in. I called my grandma the next day and told her I wasn’t feeling well. The next day he was love bombing me as if nothing happened. It has been a few days since and he’s still mad that I ever considered going and keeps saying “this is why I don’t want to marry you anytime soon”. I understand we agreed on finding our own church but I don’t think that taking my grandma to a choir concert is disrespecting that, aita?