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You can't make this shit up
this post was submitted on 03 Feb 2025
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Leopards Ate My Face
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[Scene opens on a wide, desolate savanna at dusk. The camera slowly pans over a leopard lying under a tree, its large body barely able to move. The sun is setting, casting a cold, dim light over the scene. Soft wind rustles through the dry grass. The leopard’s eyes are dull, its breathing labored.]
Narrator (soft, somber voice): In the wild, leopards are meant to stalk, to hunt, to climb. But for some, this is no longer possible. These are the leopards of the forgotten savanna... the ones who can no longer live the life they were born to lead.
[Cut to a close-up of another leopard, this one lying next to a watering hole, panting heavily. The camera lingers on its enormous, bloated body, its paws barely able to reach the ground. The leopard’s eyes seem vacant, devoid of the wild spark they once had.]
Narrator: Overfed and unable to move, these leopards have been left to a slow, painful existence. They can no longer hunt their prey, no longer climb the trees to escape danger, no longer feel the thrill of the chase. They are trapped in their own bodies.
[Cue the soft, mournful opening chords of "Angel" by Sarah McLachlan. The camera slowly pans over a third leopard, sluggishly trying to rise, but its massive weight prevents it from standing. It lets out a heavy sigh, its once-strong legs buckling beneath it.]
Narrator: They are the forgotten victims of a world that has abandoned them. Too fat to run, too weak to fight... These leopards are slowly fading, one breath at a time. They need your help.
[Cut to a shot of a leopard staring out over the savanna. The camera lingers on its face, eyes half-closed, its expression one of quiet resignation.]
Narrator: For just $3 a day, you can provide the care and support these leopards so desperately need. A donation will help give them the chance to live a life of dignity. Help them find their way back to the wild they were meant to roam.
[The music swells as the camera fades to black, and the words "Your donation can make a difference" appear in white text on the screen.]
Narrator (whispering): Please, don’t let them suffer in silence. The time to act is now.
[The music fades out, and the SPCA logo appears in the corner, along with a toll-free number and website for donations.]
"Trumpy, you got some 'splainin' a-do!"
Famed Nixon and Reagan supporter and Cuban nobility exile Desi Arnaz. His pastimes included drinking and prostitutes. He'd be a trump man.
Edit: fun fact, his family went into exile not with the Cuban revolution with Castro, but the one that put Batista in power. His father was part of the corrupt Machado government. People were not happy with the aristocrats being fat and happy during the depression. He liked to portray himself as a rags to riches story but curiously also went to one of the most elite private Catholic high schools in the states with Al Capone's son in the middle of the depression. Give me a break.
Lmfao. Living his best life. 🫡
LOLOLOL!!! Good! Adios asshole!
I could easily find articles on his being in custody, but I didn't find any references for his Trump support. Where should I look?
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LMFAO 😂
Jews For Hitler: down with us! He doesn't mean it, right?
Rip bozo
Good. Fuck him and anyone who voted for Trump.
Apparently he was arrested back in November for failing to appear for arraignment and been accused by another Cuban activist for being a scammer
Well, he WAS running with his peer crowd.
Wait I thought all illegal immigrants voted blue?
Apparently not even the "good" brown people are safe.
Lol. Lmao, even.
I can’t really say I feel sorry for him.
Tbh, I’m surprised that Cubans are being deported.
Well, lots of them are not white...
HAhahahaha