this post was submitted on 01 Apr 2024
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GenZedong
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3 months deep into unemployment, I feel like I'm going crazy, stuck in the house, no cash, lots of noodles and ham sandwiches. I think I've eaten more ham sandwiches in the last month than I have my entire life.
Been there, hope you can stick through it and make it out on top
I start a new job within the next three weeks of just getting trained up and getting licensed. My concern went from, I'm not going to be able to pay my rent, to this job is going to make me more money than I've ever made in my life and potentially break the cycle of poverty before me, going back as far as my family can remember. I'm kind of weighing that. It's not like a DOD thing, I'm not contributing to that, but, you know.
There's that idea of, am I a class traitor for making this money or trying to make this money? Which is not the goal, you know, of course. Like, I sell t-shirts online with art on them and stuff, but I wouldn't consider myself petite bourgeoisie because I don't own the means to produce those shirts. I mean, I make like 200 bucks a month just to help cover rent, you know. Hell I try to give away profits when I can, friends need healthcare. So, it's just... Trying not to moralize my place as an individual within the system, I mean, I got out of tech because basically every tech company is complicit with this genocide, and even the ones that are removed Not like I worked for Raytheon or something, but still. So, just trying to not betray my own principles while paying my rent, you know.
I know communism isn't a cult of poverty but being from.that background, and then becoming a Marxist, it can feel like it on a personal level.