Selfhosted
A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don't control.
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When did OP say they were specifically asking for privacy focused suggestions?
I'm a big fan of privacy but I've also worked in IT for over 20 years and know that you have to also consider convenience of technology for older people, otherwise they just avoid using these things.
Their title and post mention VPNs multiple times. The P is Private. They also mention wanting to use their own storage, again implying privacy. Their entire post implies they care about privacy.