this post was submitted on 16 Jul 2026
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No Stupid Questions

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No such thing. Ask away!

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Yes, and it's not just boomers. Apart from obvious homophobic responses you have to come out over and over again if the people you are interacting with are making assumptions about you.

People default to cishet norms so imagine being asked about your husband when you have a wife and now you feel like you have to correct them. Everyone in the situation now has to decide how to respond. Its awkward as fuck. Or when someone's eyes get wide after you mention your wife in passing, or use a female name for your partner. Now you need to understand if they are going to be a problem.

I remember running into a higher up and her family at a coffee shop and her shying saying, "Oh, these are my people." I realized I knew nothing about her personal life (we didn't work closely). I felt so bad that she had to think about how I could react instead of just introducing them.

In terms of like kids coming out to family/friends there will always be that fear of rejection. It's a scary thing to say, "hey I'm not that thing you assumed I was". Further, I think generally shrugs are discouraged - if the person is making announcement it generally means it is important to them, so it may be best supportive to meet that energy.