this post was submitted on 25 May 2026
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Shapeshifting into inanimate things is great until you find out it's DnD polymorph rules and it gives you 0 INT/CHA/WIS, I would be afraid of testing tbh
Form of...
A human brain and limbic system encased in a gold bar!
.... yeah so it turns out that if you try to apply ... any even sort of consistent 'rule set' to shapeshifting... it results in either extreme body horror, or physics defying nonsense, or both.
I dunno, apparently caterpillars can somehow retain some memories when changing into butterflies, despite essentially turning into soup, so, maybe there is some kind of way this can make some kind of sense...
I think the main problem would be being conscious enough to become human again. Would a gold bar even notice time pass? You would probably be stuck as a gold bar forever
Animorphs 'solved' this problem with time limits and basically mental conditioning.
Your brain transforms too, but somehow 'you' mostly remain intact.
But... if you're weak minded, the beast takes over, its instincts are too overwhelming, you lose yourself and become the beast.
How this would work with a ... gold bar?
Well the closest thing I can think of would be like a trilobyte, iirc their outer carapace was literally minerals, basically a rock.
But I might be wrong about that.