this post was submitted on 11 May 2026
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GenZedong
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People around me are getting married and having kids left and right. I'm 30 and it's just a natural thing to happen to people around my age, but man you start to put imaginary pressure on yourself.
I'm in my 40s, not married, and have no kids. I've been with my partner for 16 years now though.
people like to make comments and things but whatever. i don't really feel the need to change anything.
we're pretty nearly past the age of having kids now but adoption is always an option if we decide we want to have any kids.
anyway i feel like it would have been entirely irresponsible to bring a kid into the world with your much of a trainwreck my life has been until recently so it's nobody's business to tell me what i should and shouldn't be doing.
I felt various kinds of pressure in my twenties and then somehow managed to continue it in my thirties. I hate individualism because it makes my life trajectory feel like something I'm personally succeeding at or "wasting" and it's going to be meaningless if I don't FOMO get to doing the "right stuff" with it. I yearn for a sense of collective meaning about life with stable shared purpose. But I'm too deep in atheism to want to be religious and I was born in Yankeeville. So yeehaw, time to go give another yank on my bootstraps. Maybe this time I'll be able to pull myself up...
Yeah tell me about it. There are 4 kids in my family and my two brothers aren't having kids (one got sterilized and the other is gay). My sister is in her mid 30s and by the looks of it, she isn't having kids either even though she's married
I'm the youngest (in my mid 20s), and I'm really starting to feel the pressure of being the one responsible for continuing the bloodline. So yeah I totally get you
That's a eugenicists brain worm. Kill that idea.
Like if you have an interesting family history and culture its cool to pass that sort of thing on but that doesn't need to be given to someone spawned of your loins.
I don't have an interesting family history lol. It's less about a "bloodline" and more just the expectation that at least someone in the family will give my parents grandkids
Sorry, I shoulda phrased that better, perhaps "bloodline" was the wrong word
No need to apologize. I was raised to believe in the responsibility to "continue the family line" too. Its just insidious how the eugenicist ideas get slipped into our brains.
my sisters all have multiple kids.. but I'm the only man with my grandpa's name. i did feel a lot of pressure at one point but i just think in the grand scheme of things this is absolutely unimportant
You made me feel better. Thank you