this post was submitted on 04 Mar 2026
391 points (98.8% liked)
me_irl
7384 readers
587 users here now
All posts need to have the same title: me_irl it is allowed to use an emoji instead of the underscore _
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
Therapy is very frustrating, i agree with you. Progress is soooo slow, and there seems to be this barrier i simply cannot break through. But at least it helped with some of my most self-destructive impulses like my addiction to fentanyl painkillers, which is the reason i keep going there,
I am a bit of an outlier i think, because i have been in multiple relationships for the last 27 years (it's not that i had the courage to actually try for relationships, but it still happened, back then when i had a bit of social life in my early 20s), so i at least wasn't physically lonely (in the beginning), but emotionally i always withdrew after the "honeymoon" phase, trapping myself in a limbo where i lived with someone, but i couldn't do shit because i wasn't able to take the space for myself i would've needed to actually live, or even end the relationship out of fear of conflict.
I am actually going to live on my own for the first time now (starting with april or may), and I think it will be for the better. I do fear the loneliness, but it will probably beat being stuck in perpetuity in a long dead relationship.
It really is a lonely disorder, even when there are people.
I had a string of relationships in my 20s as well, but I don't think any of them were healthy and I developed my own drinking habit to cope before realizing I didn't want that misery for myself.
Dunno if you want any advice to consider, but I've lived alone for most of my 30s, and I have to say having a pet really helps. I have a cat and a dog, and the dog does provide more opportunities for conversations to happen just seeing the same people on the trails we walk every day. These are usually shallow conversations so it's easier to avoid feeling like I've upset anyone (it still happens lol "why did I say good morning that way??" but it's low stakes at least). But even having a plant to take care of helps with the loneliness, because you have this living thing that occupies the same space as you, and even if you can't leave the house today you can still share being alive and existing with this plant or creature.
Anyway, I wish you all the luck with your move and your new future
Edit: I just realized we've commented to each other before, I was on a different account though lol. I'm glad your move date is so close now :)