this post was submitted on 13 Feb 2026
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I have been thinking on how to celebrate my birthday, I thought of inviting my parents to my favorite restaurant. When I brought it up, they were all upset "why don't you invite us to your home? Why don't you cook for us? Restaurant is all reheated food, home cooked fresh food is much better" etc. We have lived in Europe for almost my whole life, I don't really understand what's wrong with going out to eat or why they expect me to invite them to my house and prepare a festive meal on my birthday.

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[–] lasta@piefed.world 7 points 1 day ago

It is custom in some cultures, including mine, to host holidays and personal events in your own home and visit friends and family in their homes when it is their turn. There may not be (or have been at the time) a good selection of restaurants, those restaurants might be expensive or exclusive, and inviting someone for a home cooked meal feels like the more personal and thoughtful thing to do. Some older generations have a hard time letting go of these customs without understanding that circumstances have changed (less family and community support, more options for eating out).

It can be exhausting having to regularly host and clean before and after large groups of people on top of all your other responsibilities and I can’t blame anyone for wanting to celebrate in a restaurant or somewhere outside the home.