Hey all, I desperately need a job, preferably in a helpdesk position, eventually going into sysadmin or devops. Any tips on landing a job (at this point any job)?
I do not have Linkedin, I hate that platform but I dont know if I should make an account on it. I dont have GitHub cause fuck microsoft. I have my own website, but dont really have projects to show off other than years of selfhosting services, as I'm not a programmer, though I know scripting e.g. bash and such. At most what I have to show is a month of internship in a company's IT department. I have a nicely formatted LaTeX CV with my custom domain email and website linked. The website is handcrafted html, not tailwindcss or whatever else bloated garbage.
I have no clue how to apply or where. I also need to lie cause all of them want years of experience, which I kinda do have, but not officially, so if anyone has tips for lying would be great. Thought of pretending to be a small bussines owner as others recommended this here by making a fake company digital footprint but I'm unsure how effective it is. It sucks to be qualified largely and yet ignored because of the college requirement.
I'm failing college right now and will drop out because of the shit circumstances i'm in (financially and itherwise) so I found that even if I'm hypothetically a fit for the job quite well because I dont have a degree they just dont answer, how can I unfuck myself out of this situation? Feels hopeless to just keep bleeding out money with no end and only getting worse. So any advice on getting a job (of any kind at this point) including how to lie my way into one or what tactics to use idk anything would be of great use.
Thank you!! 
If you're in the US and don't mind working physically instead of help desk, there are jobs at the data centers. To get one of those jobs first, do not use AI. Write your resume as a regular word document in times or ariel, do not use tables or other formating, just bullet points. Have a project section on your resume. Rewrite each resume as SEO with keywords from the job description as it appears on the company website (not post on indeed). During any application process, manually type in responses as some companies are tracking WPM. Be able to describe what the parts of a computer are and what they do, understand post, understand isolation testing, understand basics of networking. Look up each company's workforce philosophy and be prepared to answer questions about how you align with stories, in STAR format. If you know those things and don't use AI, you can get the job. Really can't stress this enough, do not use AI during your interview!
Not in the US. That's such a bland CV, thought something in latex would impress, didnt know they wanted an unformatted word document lmao; I know way more than what you described but lack in projects
What's the STAR format?
Programs are more likely to have difficulty parsing the resume if it's at all interesting. STAR was correctly described on other response. You could do a couple of simple projects that sound ound good on paper and hit keywords, like turn an old computer into a home server. That lets you mention server repair, installing Linux, partitioning, formating and encrypting drives, using ssh, manually setting up the network configuration and VPN. You could put Kali on a VM and try to hack your own wifi, with that you have virtualization, pentesting and network security. It also lets you use these projects as stories for when you answer the behavioral questions