Hey all, I desperately need a job, preferably in a helpdesk position, eventually going into sysadmin or devops. Any tips on landing a job (at this point any job)?
I do not have Linkedin, I hate that platform but I dont know if I should make an account on it. I dont have GitHub cause fuck microsoft. I have my own website, but dont really have projects to show off other than years of selfhosting services, as I'm not a programmer, though I know scripting e.g. bash and such. At most what I have to show is a month of internship in a company's IT department. I have a nicely formatted LaTeX CV with my custom domain email and website linked. The website is handcrafted html, not tailwindcss or whatever else bloated garbage.
I have no clue how to apply or where. I also need to lie cause all of them want years of experience, which I kinda do have, but not officially, so if anyone has tips for lying would be great. Thought of pretending to be a small bussines owner as others recommended this here by making a fake company digital footprint but I'm unsure how effective it is. It sucks to be qualified largely and yet ignored because of the college requirement.
I'm failing college right now and will drop out because of the shit circumstances i'm in (financially and itherwise) so I found that even if I'm hypothetically a fit for the job quite well because I dont have a degree they just dont answer, how can I unfuck myself out of this situation? Feels hopeless to just keep bleeding out money with no end and only getting worse. So any advice on getting a job (of any kind at this point) including how to lie my way into one or what tactics to use idk anything would be of great use.
Thank you!! 
I love LaTeX and used it for my resume for years - you should be using a word doc. The autoreaders that everyone use can barely handle a PDF of straight text, .doc is so much easier to read programmatically. You can export your documents from OpenOffice or Only office as .doc, so no need to engage with Microsoft's Office suite.
I would suggest making a LinkedIn not to post or anything, but basically as a small step of "I am a real person". Toss a picture up, say how long you've been in school, write a little blurb on your interests, send requests to some buddies/professors.
Last thing I'd suggest is taking your resume and having some LLM jazz it up - ask it to be revised to be "more marketable" and see if you could skate by with the claims it makes. 95% of learning is done on the job, school is more to get you used to ways of thinking.
I just got a new job after years of applying, and I do think that these steps helped me as they were changes I made just a few months before getting an offer. I'm in software engineering so a bit different field, but feel free to shoot me a dm with your resume or anything and I could tell you if it at least reads an convincing to me.
Ugh I hate doc, pain; thought that by using a beautiful LaTeX document I would stand out compared to poorly formatted docs lol
Not exactly inclined to post my face up with all the "AI" scrapers going on, and just sucks that then with a linkedin anyone will be able to search me by my legal name and find me just ugh feels anathema to all the privacy I've practiced over the years
Tysm when I'm free I'll DM you my cv!!