this post was submitted on 13 Jan 2026
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Autism
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I hate that this might come off as promoting masking, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do...This is what I do in social situations I feel the need to get through as an adult:
Make friends with the loudest, most talkative person. Someone who does not care what you have to say, at all, and will gladly just yap all the time. That way when you are in group convos, they can carry the both of you - you are not expected to contribute to the conversation and you can just kind of zone out if you need to. Smile, nod, mirror others facial expressions and energy.
Not sure if it works long term but I feel like I got through a few years at a work place where we were expected to have lunch together daily like this.
Please note I'm not saying to never speak or be yourself. You can just apply this technique to stressful group situations where you might be overwhelmed and worry about being perceived. People tend to be more forgiving of 'quirky' behavior one on one if you appear to fit into a group.
Yea, I'm myself with my friend, but with others I need to do masking.