Dull Men's Club
An unofficial chapter of the popular Dull Men's Club.
1. Relevant commentary on your own dull life. Posts should be about your own dull, lived experience. This is our most important rule. Direct questions, random thoughts, comment baiting, advice seeking, many uses of "discuss" rarely comply with this rule.
2. Original, Fresh, Meaningful Content.
3. Avoid repetitive topics.
4. This is not a search engine
Use a search engine, a tradesperson, Reddit, friends, a specialist Facebook group, apps, Wikipedia, an AI chat, a reverse image search etc. to answer simple questions or identify objects. Also see rule 1, “comment baiting”.
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5. Keep it dull. If it puts us to sleep, it’s on the right track. Examples of likely not dull: jokes, gross stuff (including toes), politics, religion, royalty, illness or injury, killing things for fun, or promotional content. Feel free to post these elsewhere.
6. No hate speech, sexism, or bullying No sexism, hate speech, degrading or excessively foul language, or other harmful language. No othering or dehumanizing of anyone or negativity towards any gender identity.
7. Proofread before posting. Use good grammar and punctuation. Avoid useless phrases. Some examples: - starting a post with "So" - starting a post with pointless phrases, like "I hope this is allowed" or “this is my first post” Only share good quality, cropped images. Do not share screenshots of images; share the original image.
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Buy all the shit now. You won’t have the mental capacity to make purchasing decisions that well after you’re a parent. Buy and store the crib now. Stroller.
Get one of those log books and diligently record the feedings, diaper changes, medicines, etc. it’s invaluable to refer to for doctor and midwife follow-ups. You’ll know when you don’t need to record that level of detail anymore and can stop.
Read a few parenting books. Take them with a grain of salt. “Expert parents” have had a few genetically similar children. “Experts” have studied, at arm’s length, a bunch of children that weren’t theirs. Their opinions and experiences do NOT necessarily apply to your child. It’s a starting point and nothing more, despite the absurd promises the make in their introductions.
A routine is super important. Stick to one, especially for sleep. If baby sleeps, YOU SLEEP. An irregular sleep cycle seeps into your whole life quickly.
Your job is to safely raise your child to adulthood and hopefully not turn out to be an asshole. The romantic notion of “shaping” a child to be a better version of you is a fantasy. Resist those feelings and act and speak based on what you think your child needs for their development/understanding RIGHT NOW.
Set up boundaries with family early. Stick to them. That includes enforcing how they speak to your child. I don’t care if that’s how grandma was raised, telling a 1 year old their hand will get chopped off if they touch an electrical outlet is not helpful.
The child’s nap schedule is probably more important than any social obligation. If going to a lunch means your kid misses their nap and is a screaming, miserable monster for the rest of your day, then that lunch is OPTIONAL. Don’t go if it’s going to ripple through the rest of your day.
Child proof things in your home in increments. The kid won’t be walking for the first year - focus on padding for under 2’. Reassess when they’re walking and growing for new dangers. You won’t be able to do it all at once.
If you don’t have a ton of space, make it clear to friends and family that you don’t want any big gifts. If we get one more fucking stuffed animal…
Babies nap best in total dark. Make sure their sleeping area is as close to pitch black as you can get it. (This varies with the child, but I read it in a parenting book and it was absolutely true for us)
You will have far less money and mental capacity once you’re a parent - front load everything you can now!
Needed edit: 'buy all the stuff now, used. '
All that shit is used for 3-6 months and then passed on. No need to buy it new when used stuff is practically new. Only bottle nipples you should buy new.