askchapo

He calls me a revisionist about five times an hour, join the club. Usually because he doesn't like my cuddling technique. He says I "suck in bed" meaning that a night's worth of cuddling is less enjoyable than he'd hoped, and I have to stifle a laugh, he's so innocent and adorable. He calls everyone a revisionist. He sharpens his claws on my Soviet flag because he's still mad about the Sino-Soviet Split. He eats my bamboo kitchen implements. He throws me out of the bed so he can hold a party meeting with all the other teddy bears. He's the worst comrade ever. And a really bad roommate, for a teddy bear.

But the hugs are really good, okay? He can call me a revisionist and chew up my cutting board all he wants if I get those sweet panda bear hugs. And a 🐼 who's a stereotypical Maoist is funny and very cute. At least he knows who Lenin was. Unlike another stuffed bear in a red shirt who I only ever get as far as "peace, land, hunny!" with.