Gatekeeping is specifically excluding people for arbitrary stated reasons. You're keeping the gate closed when you gatekeep

No, it is not.

From oxford languages:

the activity of controlling, and usually limiting, general access to something. "Wal-Mart's cultural gatekeeping has served to narrow the mainstream for entertainment offerings"

Thanks. I just want to clarify on some things which might be obscure since autism and all:

• I accept that whoisearth made these experiences but I don’t come to the same conclusion.

simply ignoring their point and unconditionally adopting your view

No. That is not what I said. It just does not make sense to me to draw a conclusion like that from this experience. Also, the „silent masses“ is not an argument, no sources have been cited and it is an anecdotal fallacy. (I.e.: I made this experience so this is representative)

If you google „autism self diagnosis valid“ you will find many articles stating that in general, self diagnosis is a way of dealing with the very limited resources in autism healthcare and considered a more helpful strategy at this point.

We are talking about people harming themselves or worse because they are helpless and don’t know what to do. Gatekeeping cost’s lives.

Also, if someone wants to challenge me, attack the idea that invalidating self diagnosis is gatekeeping (which will probably fail) and not me personally because it shows lack of character.

The summary of this imo is that the experience of parents to autistic children to late/undiagnosed autistic adults could not be more different and we should probably just leave our pent up emotions at home and try to find common ground and accept eachother. What happens otherwise (which we have seen) is two sides usually living in their echo chambers and disresprecting the other side when they come in contact.

It’s pretty impossible for me to explain autistic thinking of an adult to anyone not on the spectrum because it’s night and day from allistic thinking.

Thanks for elaborating. I mean, I would say someone who thinks they are autistic would most likely have a reason for that. Mostly that is more than one or or one very strong autistic trait. Without that I would ask how they concluded they might be autistic.

An then there is the somewhat tinfoil hat style idea that you have trolls and non autistic people in online communities to an extend who can make the majority if a group is very small and not moderated enough. That way you can end up with people preferring to judge if others are valid instead of blanket accepting everyone.

There are a lot of factors that can contribute to this. Also, I have met people who pretty sure are on the spectrum but who are ableists par excellence since they were molded to fit society’s standards. So, there is a ton of stuff to take care of in a sub like this.

I‘m having a hard time finding the source of the miscommunication here but I get you. It is insanely frustrating to talk with the uninitiated about autism in adults.

My therapist stepped on my feelings so many times I can’t count them. „Do you really think you‘re autistic?“ well, the diagnosis says so and I also stimm a lot, have selective mutism, lack facial expressions, don’t understand body language, cant read or remember faces, am mindblind and countless other things I can’t think of rn.

I‘m not stupid either but it turns out I‘m very easy to take advantage of if I trust someone. Bad combination.

Proving my point? You're a non-disabled person trolling a disability forum with ableism, but you think you have some righteous justification because you know somebody with a more severe disability. And you'll never self reflect on it. Spicyautism in a nutshell.