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this post was submitted on 27 Aug 2023
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I like being direct. I don't have all the answers (no one does) but I think asking people to think about solutions when they offer criticism helps move the conversation forward.
You gotta read the room and understand the context. Someone brings up a thought/question casually on lemmy, it's gonna make you sound super self-impressed and generally naive to respond as though you're the one who (or anyone at all) is going to get that thread to a global solution for an incredibly difficult issue that people are already working on. Everyone is just spitballing for fun and curious if any novel thoughts will get tossed around in a thread, so when you reapond to someone highlighting an issue by saying "okay, so what's the solution" as though people aren't already thinking of that or wouldn't have included it in the comment if there was one, it isn't productive, it ignores the intention of the comment, and it makes you sound like the crappy boss in a bad movie. What is expected? Someone to say, "The solution? I hadn't thought about that! The whole thing is cracked! Invaluable contribution!" In the end, there's just a huge difference between saying something like "That's interesting, I wonder what the biggest obstacles are" and "Okay, I approve of your thoughts, and I know thats important to everyone, but they are incomplete, which you likely didn't notice. Let me help you with the next step by asking, what's the next step, which, beside offering great insight, is surely the type of conversation you were looking for in this thread."
You know what I agree with you. I should work on my tone more and try to contribute at the same time. Thanks for the feedback.
That's super open minded and uncommonly positive, and makes me think I didn't necessarily come to this thread with the most constructive tone myself. I'll think more about how I voice feedback as well online for this.