Oh wow, I see what you're saying. I'm doing a terrible job communicating tonight and my miscommunication is coming out as incredibly alarming dialogue.

You know, I'd like to try explaining my comment so that you can understand the missing context, but I don't know how long of an essay I'd have to write to do that. Rereading that comment outside my own head for a moment, I see something that makes me think "holy shit, this guy is fucked." So, apologies, I'll try to do better next time.

The one clarification I'd like to make: I don't like killing people. I don't like gore videos or any of that. Horror movies are cool; real horror, not my jam. I like killing people/things in video games. The way I see it, a group of people went through a lot of trouble making me be able to interact with things in games and death animations, etc. I like to push every video game as far as I can to see how stuff will interact. The first time I booted up Cyberpunk 2077, I spent hours punching every object in the game to find out what breaks how with what audio and if I could get the game to crash by focusing on all the wrong stuff.

Anyway, game death and destruction=good; real stuff=bad. Sorry for the alarming comment. And to answer your question, yes, I see a therapist and think that everyone should get to talk to a therapist. Mental health is no joke. I appreciate you checking in on me.