No Stupid Questions

• Ever used micosoft word or excel?
• Some freebies that look good without requiring much (invent a little story to go along with them in case they ask about them in the interview): "Learning new skills", "Problem solving", "Documentation", "Troubleshooting"
• Did you ever go to highschool (or your country's equivalent)? You can put that down as well.

If making a "fun" cv sparks joy, by all means go for it! But seriously do not submit it to any employers. The corporate world absolutely hates whimsy

Looks like you're familiar with a few software packages, most of which I've never heard of. List those. Also, do you have a driver's license? That fills a line of two,

Gotta love the dichotomy of "I have no skills" to "Anyways, I considered doing this in LaTeX or plain HTML".
Mate, even you just understanding what LaTeX and HTML do, that requires so many skills which are not at all par for the course.

And I would actually take that quote from their posting at face value. I talked to the main recruiter at our company before and he told me that for entry level positions, the only thing they really care about is why the person believes this to be a good job for them. Have they done something similar as part of a hobby before and enjoyed it, for example?

Because ultimately, you will need to be taught a ton of things, no matter what your grades looked like or how many overachiever prizes you can list. And if you're likely to quit after a few months, because it's not the right job for you, then the company invested a lot of time teaching you, which isn't going to pay off.

So, yeah, whatever made you consider this job posting, I would try to describe. Most of that will be in the cover letter, but if you've got specific skills or hobbies that you consider relevant, then throw those onto the CV.

Your profile bio mentions Arch, Thinkpad, and SDRs. Just from that, you can likely expand your skills section to spell out the operating systems that you're familiar* with (including others like Windows or Mac OS, if you've used those), possibly with inclusion of anything related to coreboot (if you've done that), and can include radio technologies in its own section under either skills or interests.

Don't sell yourself short, because if a job posting is upfront that they're not looking for hard skills as a prerequisite, then the assignment is to present yourself as a candidate with depth. They're clearly looking for candidates in a non-conventional manner, so you should showcase all your non-conventional aspects. Don't be afraid of including "niche" details like RTL-SDR, because they can easily do a web search to figure out what that is. But do contextualize it as a tech interest, because if maybe the job requires working with complex, one of a kind tech, then they might value the candidate that self-learned.

Regarding "familiarity" on a resume, to be "familiar" with XYZ just means that you at least know what it is and have probably used it. Listing out some skills on a resume means, at least to me, that you're familiar with all of those skills. It's different if you're actually an expert or fairly accomplished with something, in which case you'd describe that skill in detail, usually giving an example that you've worked on. I recommend including everything you can think of, even the mundane stuff like Microsoft Word; you'd be surprised how many people don't know how to use Word or Excel.

Dickprint, obviously.

Wouldn't you put your school results on there? I remember when mine was boring. You could also say you're proficient with word processing software. I used to have random stuff like "experienced with vector graphics" on mine because I knew my way around inkscape

A CV is just a list of things you've done during your life so far. Unless someplace is asking for your résumé AND CV then they're probably only looking for your résumé. People conflate the two all the time.

Even then those who ask for both typically leave the CV as optional.

For those without much experience I usually recommend a skills résumé. Searching "skills resume example" or similar will net some useful results.

I recommend keeping the résumé to a single page. Provide your name and contact info at the top. Under each Skill you include provide a list of how you've used the skill or how you learned it.

Example:

derek        derek@infosec.pub
                  phone number
                  other info if needed

Skills
   Skill 1
      One or two sentences about how I learned skill 1.
      One or two sentences about how I've used skill 1 to solve a problem.
      One or two sentences about how I've used skill 1 to help someone else solve their problem.

   Skill 2
      One or two sentences about how I learned skill 2.
      One or two sentences about how I've used skill 2 to solve a problem.
      One or two sentences about how I've used skill 2 to help someone else solve their problem.

Relevant Experience (include this section if you can think of any relevant experience at all)
   Experience 1
      Some blurb about experience 1.

   Experience 2
      Some blurb about experience 2.

Training (same rules as with Relevant Experience section)

References (if anyone at all can vouch for you then including them here can be helpful)
   Available upon request.

The most important aspect of submitting an application for anything is actually submitting it. It doesn't have to be perfect or polished to get you an interview. It just has to be real and in front of a hiring manager's eyes.

I've reviewed applications, conducted interviews, and hired people before. I can tell you, for any entry level role, that an earnest person who is willing to listen and learn, admit ignorance readily, and ask for help openly, is going to get the job over someone with fancy paperwork who lacks those traits in-person.

Do some volunteering or some unpaid internship. Then write that on your CV

If your resumé would be light in experiences, especially if you are young, then you can expand on your "skills" section. In resumés/CVs and later possibly in interviews, show some of the kinds of problems you solved and the technologies you used to solve them. Start thinking about any communication issues you might have had with your friends and classmates, sometimes online strangers, and remember how that got resolved so you can talk about it.

Director at a large cap multinational, but I am under an NDA so...

Anything that can relate to the employer who you are and what your capable of. School, clubs, hobbies, volunteer work, etc. Brag a little about some of your accomplishments and why they were important to you. List a few goals and how those relate to the company/industry.

goat.se

Honestly.

Just don’t lie. Put what you got. If you have experience with something at a hobby level, mark it as personal experience and offer to bring samples of things you’ve done to an interview. (Don’t violate any one’s proprietary stuff, mind. But sometimes “hobbyists” punch well above the pay grade.)

Try out Typst. I use it for math homework because the syntax is so insanely nice. It's also not the Perl package hell that is Latex

You're over thinking some of this. Create a resume in libre office to confirm to common practices. Don't put in fancy shit with draw or do something fancy with latex. Unless an employer specifically requests something nonstandard, you're just going to get filtered out or upset whoever has to review your art project.

You must have some level of education like highschool, GED, or equivalent depending on where you live. Put any job experience you have or formal positions you've held. If you can find one, I would heavily recommend going to a professional to help you write your resume. I worked at a company for a little over 9 years and was applying at a different company. I thought I had a decent resume until I worked with a guy that does this for a living and he humbled me. It was a complete re-write but I ended up with the job. If you can't find someone, I'd start at your local library and if they can't help, they may be able to steer you to good resources.