this post was submitted on 29 Jul 2026
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me_irl

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[–] Landless2029@lemmy.world 13 points 17 hours ago* (last edited 17 hours ago) (1 children)

I remember one of those malware scams that install a program that ran full screen on your PC, took a pic of you with your webcam then claim it found CP on your PC with FBI logos and shit. Then asked for gift cards to "drop the investigation"

[–] 0x0@lemmy.zip 9 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

I love reading those in my camera-less PC:

[–] Landless2029@lemmy.world 9 points 14 hours ago

I used to work at a PC repair shop. It was always a laugh when a parent brought one in with a teenage boy in the webcam shot.

[–] mycodesucks@lemmy.world 44 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Live your life in such a way that if the worst shit you do gets leaked, everyone in your life's response will be:

"hahaha... yeah... that's classic him/her."

[–] kerrigan778@lemmy.blahaj.zone 16 points 1 day ago (4 children)

The implication is it's nudes or a sex tape. Something private, not shameful.

[–] mangobanana@discuss.online 5 points 16 hours ago (2 children)

Man I've been a fat lesbian my whole life, ain't no fucking way anybody is going to take nude pics of me hell I don't even want clothing pics of me. Now I'm an old married fat lesbian, sure the fuck am not going to start taking nudes at this point

[–] BigBananaDealer@lemmy.world 1 points 8 hours ago

nice username

[–] rethnor@lemmy.zip 1 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Have you never heard of rule 34?

[–] Lushed_Lungfish@lemmy.ca 6 points 21 hours ago

Speaking just for myself, if someone wants to beat it to my freaky naked ass, I'd be flattered.

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[–] YellowParenti@lemmy.wtf 63 points 1 day ago (1 children)

The KGB considered french diplomats immune to blackmail due to how widespread cheating is. When they approached them, the diplomat would ask for a copy the tape so they could show off how hot their hookup was.

[–] Hadriscus@jlai.lu 2 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 3 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Very widespread story. As to the truth of it, who really knows?

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 3 points 8 hours ago (1 children)

Considering how the French seem to like portraying themselves, it's probably at least partially true.

[–] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 3 points 8 hours ago

Entirely possible. It was certainly way, way more socially acceptable in France than in the US.

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 75 points 1 day ago (1 children)

My favorite is the one when they text me that they hacked my phone and took video of me masturbating while watching porn. I'm like "homie, knowing that you're watching makes it so much hotter".

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 11 points 1 day ago (1 children)

"Give me $7000 in bitcoin or I will send the video to your loved ones." Uh, joke's on you motherfucker.

[–] echodot@feddit.uk 4 points 17 hours ago (2 children)

That's when you go all technology noob on them and ask them to guide you how to pay them.

[–] uberfreeza@lemmy.world 2 points 5 hours ago

A Kitboga classic

[–] ChickenLadyLovesLife@lemmy.world 5 points 17 hours ago

That would be kind of funny if it worked. "I'll give you the $7000, but to do it I'll need you to set up an Amazon gift card in my name with $100 in it."

[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 12 points 1 day ago

"Oh no! Not the thing with the garden hose and the lion I hope?!"

[–] AmyAye@nord.pub 60 points 1 day ago (2 children)

I had a spam email this morming that started out something like "Greetings Sinner"

And I was just like, damn right, then deleted it.

[–] pentastarm@piefed.ca 43 points 1 day ago

My fav is to reply with memes, like this (I know you aren't supposed to, since they'll know your account is active):

[–] Zarobi@aussie.zone 6 points 1 day ago (1 children)

What an opener, I'm going to use that one. Thanks, sinner

[–] JoMiran@lemmy.ml 5 points 1 day ago

The #1 tennis player in the world's name is Yanik Sinner. What a bad ass family name.

[–] xkbx@startrek.website 112 points 1 day ago (1 children)

acting like my body is a crime scene instead of a work of art

[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 3 points 8 hours ago (1 children)
[–] anotherspinelessdem@lemmy.ml 3 points 6 hours ago (1 children)
[–] bhamlin@lemmy.world 1 points 3 hours ago

The best kind of art

[–] volore@scribe.disroot.org 97 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (9 children)

"Do it, I have a humiliation fetish, make me cum daddy 😖"

Scammers are never prepared for that one. I do this to those spam emails that say "I'VE HACKED YOUR COMPUTER, PAY ME BITCOIN OR I RELEASE WEBCAM VIDEOS"

[–] EggInDisguise@lemmy.blahaj.zone 69 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Crazy how so many people seem to ha e Webcam videos of me despite me not having a Webcam.

When did they sneak into my bedroom???

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[–] WhiskyTangoFoxtrot@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago (2 children)

If you reply to a spam message then the spammer will know that they have a valid address.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cm0vkrT8Yqc

[–] StellarStoat@lemmy.today 6 points 1 day ago

I have gotten fewer spam messages when I respond with other spam messages I have received. They think they got another spam number and remove it. If its a call, sometimes Ill answer, and mute the line so they cannot hear anything. I just wait it out, I don't get repeat calls after a few of those. if the person setting up the call system is caused any form of financial damage or risk for me tying up their lines, and costing them both literal money per minute as well as missed opportunity to scam some old person, I don't mind doing a little here and there. As a treat.

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[–] MurderHobo@thelemmy.club 18 points 1 day ago (2 children)

The exhibitionist in me would get my clue so hard knowing I got leaked

[–] wreckedcarzz@lemmy.world 6 points 21 hours ago

exhibitionist

no posts or links in profile

Aww, tease :(

[–] LemmyPlaceDN@europe.pub 24 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If you get blackmailed and the leverage is based on information, never comply because you can't trust the blackmailer to destroy the leverage or not leak it. Otherwise they can blackmail you over and over.

[–] lastlybutfirstly@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)

If you get blackmailed with anything, go to the police. Blackmail is extremely illegal.

[–] NotEasyBeingGreen@slrpnk.net 7 points 23 hours ago

The police are not your friends. Think of them like HR for society. 😅

[–] Prathas@lemmy.zip 12 points 1 day ago (1 children)

If only the cops were trustworthy...

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[–] fubarx@lemmy.world 29 points 1 day ago (4 children)

"Give it to me. I'll leak it myself."

...

"Now, I am the leaker!"

[–] Kekzkrieger@feddit.org 2 points 21 hours ago

Makes me leak

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[–] stopforgettingit@lemmy.world 29 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

when I took those photos was back when I looked hot, please do leak them. I want people to think I still look like that.

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[–] socsa@piefed.social 8 points 1 day ago

Mfer if you have the videos you'd know that's not leaking that's pee. Gallons and gallons of pee.

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