Humor, jokes, memes about TTRPGs
For context, they managed to successfully accomplish an impossible task (defeating a Lich with it's minions) to save their tribe's armoury and magical item stash. So their master, an Ancient Red Dragon, will give them an item from his own collection
ever published
Hold on, I need to refer to my Book of Erotic Fantasy.
their master, an Ancient Red Dragon
That gives me some ideas.
Im listening
A baaaaaad dragon
Ah yes, the bad dragon. An interesting and wholesome thing, really. Go look for it when you have time at work.
*beer opens
Keep going
*lands feet on coffee table
Voodoo dildo my ass
Art not from me, but unless you are new here you know that already
Be careful that they don't end up asking for stuff like... I dunno
The wand of Orcus
The book of vile dead
Sphere of annihilation
all magic items includes the items wielded by gods haha
The wand of Orcus
Sounds actually a fun item to roleplay for a DM :)
The Armor of the Dread Emperor.
Love Konsi! She deserves to be the new meme format.
I cannot believe some no life gave this a downvote. I agree with you
Honestly if nothing else comes from lemmy, we at least got Konsi out of it. It's all worth it now.
I choose the Scroll of Konsi. When someone picks it up and reads it, the text changes and says something that makes them surprised.
One blank Scroll of Konsi, as requested:
:) !!
For Konsi, the perfect item would be the Resurrection Sphere. Infinite use wish-tier resurrection, with a 1 minute casting time.
It still counts if it's a 3pp Pathfinder item, right?
For Konsi indeed good choice. She wouldnt care they come back as different races. Which would lead to both hilarious and fucked up moments with the families of the deceased
I haven't seen Ahdok for a while, hope they're okay :(
I think the last comic was the end of a story. Dont know if there will be more... hope so :,(
Had something similar a few sessions ago; party was raiding Vecna's ancient submerged capital castle to find his Dark Library, and each one got to have one "secret" of their choice. Wizard took a diabolic contract, the quest item; Cleric took an amulet that can exorcise demons; Fighter got a divine message and took some oil of invulnerability, but he also got greedy and took a belt of storm giant's strength.
Of course, the trick is that Vecna wanted them to get those items because he'd been orchestrating the entire campaign for a payoff centuries in the future. He's not even going to show up in the campaign, all he has to do is send his AD&D minions that have nonsense like STR-draining grapple attacks and the demilich "devour soul" variant action as a gaze attack to gatekeep the library after the fact, because old-school D&D monsters don't care if you were born in 5e.
But... why did vecna wanted them to have these, including an item the oil that is a consumable ??
Nooo I’m a monk
Get whatever has the highest resale value, then.
Which would also kickoff a fun side quest of finding a buyer, since the most expensive magical item in existence isn't exactly something you can pawn off in a random towns general store lol
They are in a kobold tribe that doesnt use money in an apocalyptic world. So, good luck on finding the buyer XD
...gloves of soul catching, staff of striking, magical tattoos, there are options...
Please offer The Head of Vecna
Im not offering anything. They choose
Ever published? I'll take a Hammership, please
No can do. It has to fit in a dragon's horde. Sorry
Take your head of Vecna, player, and sit down XD
Dragon Master
Very good. Excellent.
I'm a simple man, and will just ask for a AD&D 1e Unusual Sword +5 Holy Avenger, with an Intelligence of 17. Love me that 50% magic resistance in 5 foot radius, dispel magic at will, and +10 damage vs. Chaotic Evil.
Since I'm choosing, I'll assume optimum rolls for an "unusual sword", and take: All 14 extraordinary powers: charm person, clairaudience, clairvoyance, determine direction and depth, ESP, flying, heal, illusion, leviathan, strength, telekinesis, telepathy, teleportation, and X-ray vision.
Its Special Purpose should be slay "non-human monsters" disintegrating them on a hit unless they save (sure its special purpose should be slaying evil, but that's so restrictive. It should speak 10 languages.
Before I forget, it ought to match my alignment, so its ego doesn't overwhelm mine and make me stab myself or something. But maybe that's where the fun for the DM comes in?
They sure don't make 'em like they used to.
Whats in the book of sex magic kept in ankh-moreparks dungeon? It could only be read in an ice cold room by wizards over 80 years old, ideally when dead. Sounds like a good find.
@ahdok@ttrpg.network I miss you
Aw. I'm sorry.
I've been busy drawing the daily Konsi though.
Here you go.
Tome of the Stilled Tongue? http://dnd5e.wikidot.com/wondrous-items:tome-of-the-stilled-tongue
Btw, love your comic
Not mine, but thank you. Please follow the official publisher :)