this post was submitted on 16 Sep 2024
473 points (91.1% liked)

Microblog Memes

9156 readers
1825 users here now

A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

Rules:

  1. Please put at least one word relevant to the post in the post title.
  2. Be nice.
  3. No advertising, brand promotion or guerilla marketing.
  4. Posters are encouraged to link to the toot or tweet etc in the description of posts.

Related communities:

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] noodlejetski@lemm.ee 76 points 1 year ago (5 children)

yeah but how good would it feel

[–] anarchrist@lemmy.dbzer0.com 53 points 1 year ago

At least as good as passing a kidney stone, I'd imagine

[–] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 39 points 1 year ago (2 children)
[–] thisNotMyName@lemmy.world 44 points 1 year ago

That would be part of the French cuisine

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Like a facehugger.

[–] growsomethinggood@reddthat.com 12 points 1 year ago

[Paul Robalino voice] It wouldn't be a problem because it would feel really good, actually

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] st3ph3n@midwest.social 58 points 1 year ago (1 children)
[–] CrayonRosary@lemmy.world 23 points 1 year ago (2 children)

They would build up in your balls until your balls exploded.

[–] Master@lemm.ee 19 points 1 year ago

You would feel them moving around... inside you...

[–] msage@programming.dev 9 points 1 year ago

No, silly, pee is stored in balls

[–] Anticorp@lemmy.world 56 points 1 year ago

Can I just go back to having never read this before?

[–] Allonzee@lemmy.world 49 points 1 year ago
[–] dohpaz42@lemmy.world 45 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I’m wide awake and already experiencing nightmares. I also haven’t eaten anything today, and now I’m afraid to for fear of vomiting.

Well done! You’ve won the Internet today. I hope you’re happy.

[–] BonesOfTheMoon@lemmy.world 15 points 1 year ago

Good afternoon.

[–] 2ugly2live@lemmy.world 44 points 1 year ago

Would... Wouldn't women be able to feel that? The idea of feeling that settle and I guess... Die!? If it doesn't get fertilized? WOULD We HAVE TO PASS It BACK OUT!?

🤢🤮

[–] baggins@lemmy.ca 43 points 1 year ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] edgemaster72@lemmy.world 37 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (3 children)

We can call it a spworm

Edit: Didn't see that @Cloaca@mtgzone.com beat me to the reference by like, 4 hours

[–] BassTurd@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

Ah yes, another cultured user. Everyone should know about and subscribe to Dropout.tv for the content and to support a solidly ethical company. Sam is a saint.

[–] Facebones@reddthat.com 6 points 1 year ago

Of course Lemmy and dropout have a meaty Venn diagram, but this really makes me glad I haven't watched all the Smarty-pants 🤣

[–] Marighost@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago

I was praying there'd be Dropout fans in the replies for this one!

[–] Cloaca@mtgzone.com 30 points 1 year ago
[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 28 points 1 year ago

What the fuck is this?

[–] cheddar@programming.dev 26 points 1 year ago

Why would I imagine that??

[–] Someonelol@lemmy.dbzer0.com 25 points 1 year ago

Thanks I hate it.

[–] Honytawk@lemmy.zip 24 points 11 months ago

Would have so much more respect for swallowers

[–] MeDuViNoX@sh.itjust.works 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I'd just get an aquarium, fill it with water, bust into it, and see how long I could keep them alive.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] tatterdemalion@programming.dev 23 points 1 year ago (3 children)

Why is it in a spoon? 🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄🥄

[–] Allonzee@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

It could flop out of a fork more easily.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] JetpackJackson@feddit.org 22 points 1 year ago

I wish I could unsee this greatly

[–] crawancon@lemm.ee 20 points 1 year ago (1 children)

cum fetishes may mutate into
...pet fetishes? lol

[–] NegativeInf@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

An aquarium full of giant sperm.

[–] Vilian@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 year ago
[–] SmoothLiquidation@lemmy.world 19 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think I read that Oglaf comic.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] YungOnions@sh.itjust.works 19 points 1 year ago

What a god awful day to have eyes...

[–] meticulousmind@kbin.earth 16 points 1 year ago

alright, who's got the eye bleach?

[–] HootinNHollerin@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago (1 children)

I think I’ll take a break from the Internet now

[–] Allonzee@lemmy.world 4 points 1 year ago

Enjoy your break, It'll be weirder when you come back.

[–] Meron35@lemmy.world 12 points 1 year ago

Give it some sideburns and a smiley face and you've basically got an axolotl

[–] Sabata11792@ani.social 12 points 1 year ago

I'd have the strongest stomp in town.

[–] UltraMagnus0001@lemmy.world 9 points 1 year ago

Mass genocide every night

[–] spacejank@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 year ago

Truly a horrifying image!

[–] crawancon@lemm.ee 8 points 1 year ago

talk about weapons of ass destruction.

is this what happens when you don't jerk off for 9 months?

i think for the show Alone, the males just got an infinite protein source.

[–] TwoBeeSan@lemmy.world 8 points 1 year ago

I would hear the pro life argument

[–] Cordyceps@sopuli.xyz 7 points 11 months ago

If thst is the sperm, what about the nuts? Would you see the outlines of a bunch of these fuckers just swimming around bump7ng into the walls, stretching the sack around as they go? Well atleast checking the sperm count would get a lot easier I guess

[–] Dave2@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 year ago

Alright, why do we have picture of that? Who made it real?

[–] tfw_no_toiletpaper@lemmy.world 6 points 1 year ago (1 children)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] LucasWaffyWaf@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Shockingly, I've genuinely seen furry porn of giant oversized sperm like this.

[–] TriflingToad@lemmy.world 6 points 11 months ago

of course that's a thing

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Gork@lemm.ee 4 points 1 year ago
load more comments
view more: next ›