this post was submitted on 03 Oct 2026
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Microblog Memes

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A place to share screenshots of Microblog posts, whether from Mastodon, tumblr, ~~Twitter~~ X, KBin, Threads or elsewhere.

Created as an evolution of White People Twitter and other tweet-capture subreddits.

RULES:

  1. Your post must be a screen capture of a microblog-type post that includes the UI of the site it came from, preferably also including the avatar and username of the original poster. Including relevant comments made to the original post is encouraged.
  2. Your post, included comments, or your title/comment should include some kind of commentary or remark on the subject of the screen capture. Your title must include at least one word relevant to your post.
  3. You are encouraged to provide a link back to the source of your screen capture in the body of your post.
  4. Current politics and news are allowed, but discouraged. There MUST be some kind of human commentary/reaction included (either by the original poster or you). Just news articles or headlines will be deleted.
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[–] BassTurd@lemmy.world 95 points 4 days ago (8 children)

A year or two ago, I was having a wee and was thinking about how women dry with TP and us men are just degenerates that shake it around. I jokingly thought about creating a "wankerchief" that guys could keep around and calling it a "Peter Patter".

It definitely made me giggle far too much. It's a disgusting premise to carry around a piss covered rag, but the names I thought were on point.

[–] DrunkenDuckling@lemmus.org 23 points 4 days ago (3 children)

Im a dude and wiping with a single sheet of TP after peeing is a gamechanger Im never going back from.

[–] kestrel7_7@lemmy.world 10 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Everyone doesn’t do this? My god… 😭

[–] DrunkenDuckling@lemmus.org 3 points 3 days ago

Ikr.... We really gotta start teaching boys actual hygiene

[–] scytale@piefed.zip 4 points 3 days ago

I do it at home. It’s harder in public urinals because I forget to grab a sheet from the dispenser first. If there’s no one else in the restroom, I hold the band of my boxers open to avoid contact and waddle to the sink area to grab a sheet to wipe with. Bringing my own TP roll in my bag solves this issue though.

[–] Notyou@sopuli.xyz 7 points 3 days ago

There are dozens of us

[–] islandcoda42@lemmy.zip 5 points 3 days ago

100% highly recommend getting on board with this

[–] Manjushri@piefed.social 43 points 4 days ago (1 children)

When I'm at home I always wipe after pissing. While I'd take a pass on the piss rag in my pocket idea, the name still could apply to men's underwear. After all, our underwear is soaking up that unwiped piss already.

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Wat? Yall dont wipe? No suprise that all your stuff gets wet

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 4 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

Most guys don't wipe after peeing, yes. I do, because the thought of doing it with my underwear disgusts me, but uh... yeah I guess it just doesn't occur to most guys. Kinda like washing your hands before your touch your penis.

[–] AI_toothbrush@lemmy.zip 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I love finding out how unhygenic people are.

[–] Jax@sh.itjust.works 2 points 3 days ago

It is gross. Certainly helps paint the picture that humans are just animals with the capacity for great intelligence.

[–] catsarebadpeople@sh.itjust.works 5 points 4 days ago (2 children)

I will say two things:

  1. Just do a little push on your taint and the extra dripple comes right out.
  2. Barring that, you have to just wrap your entire dingy in a tissue or toilet paper to absorb the liquid over the next few hours. Like a lazy male tampon.
[–] DrunkenDuckling@lemmus.org 3 points 3 days ago (1 children)

That "little push" never works 100% reliably, capillary action from your underwear fabric will pull more out.

Men are so fragile they'll jump through a million hoops just to avoid peeing "like a girl"....

[–] Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 3 days ago

It has nothing to do with "peeing like a girl" and more just the efficiency of things.

A little drop is nothing in your underwear that you change every day anyway. No need to also waste paper on it.

[–] kestrel7_7@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago

What did I just read

#1 is solid. #2 is ahahahaha what??

[–] Honytawk@discuss.tchncs.de 1 points 3 days ago

You mean reuse the same wankerchief?

[–] shartgargle@lemmy.zip 5 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I wanna say this was a thing on "the league"? I'm not sure what show it was on, but it definitely was and if my memory is right, it was the league.

[–] BassTurd@lemmy.world 6 points 4 days ago

Taco created the pee bib in The League. Great show.

[–] RampantParanoia2365@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

....do you mean like the toilet paper you just mentioned?

[–] BassTurd@lemmy.world 2 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Toilet paper doesn't have a fun name.

[–] megaman@discuss.tchncs.de 4 points 3 days ago

Disagree, "shit tickets" is a funny name.

But it doesnt apply for this piss conversation...

[–] notabot@piefed.social 2 points 3 days ago

Some new words just burn themselves into your brain, and this is one of those cases. I didn't need the word "wankerchief" stuck in my head, but now it is, and I keep giggling at odd times. Thanks a bunch.