this post was submitted on 08 Sep 2026
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hexbears living with partners, (how) do you share expenses? (hexbear.net)
submitted 6 days ago by GiorgioBoymoder@hexbear.net to c/askchapo@hexbear.net
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looking for some perspective. I've been sharing a home with a partner for a while and we split our shared expenses proportionally to our share of the household income, based on gross income (i.e. I make 60% and pay 60% (at least, often more) of what we've agreed are the shared expenses). we then do our best to evenly split household chores and tasks as we choose.

another option could be to structure contributions such that we have equal personal money after making our shared contributions.

I'd think it would be simple to determine what a "fair share is" but in practice it's not, plus I'm facing criticism for my focus on "fairness" itself in this sort of exchange.

how do you do things? is it working for you?

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[–] Moomoo_Milk@hexbear.net 8 points 5 days ago

I’m a SAHW, so it really is no surprise that we use a joint account for everything. We do have separate savings for personal expenditures that we put an even amount into every paycheck.

When someone enters the polycule and moves in, they pay into the joint account and we split expenses, but this only happened once. Anything large is discussed between those in the polycule if the third+ individual is paying in. We’ll see if that stays the same if we find another person to join us again.

Admittedly I wish I could work, but I can’t, so that really shapes how things work here.