this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2024
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Now I want to see a 44-year old McCauley Culkin doing a new home alone, where his kids forget him at home.
Home Alone where Culkin plays Kevin again, but he's an adult and paranoid about people breaking into his house while his wife is on vacation, so he's rigged the whole thing as a death trap.
Remake Don't Breathe but with an adult Kevin, essentially.
Honey, I killed the kids (again)
I want to see a new Home Alone where 44-year old McCauley Culkin plays an 8 year old and no one acknowledges that he isn't actually 8 years old.
Hey if Martin Short could do it, so csn McCauly
The Critic did that joke way back in the 90s.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fonlEU7dFwA
And if you're interested in The Critic, I've authored the definitive episode guide and I suggest you BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK! BUY MY BOOK!
The peanut, is neither a pee nor a nut.
That shit had little kid me rolling on floor. And I still laugh thinking about it. Iirc it was the critics dad who said it... and for some reason I think he was on the ceiling when he said it.
Also I could not find your book on Amazon or at my local library.
I'd rather see a remake/reboot where Culkin plays a character similar to old man Marley, accidentally scaring the kid character as a local urban legend. Similar to the scene in the church in the classic, he could empathize with the kid of the movie by talking about how he once wished that his family left him alone in that time of year too, and he quickly found that he regretted that wish and he missed them terribly. A decent writer could roll with that concept and still make it a great scene where the kid has wise advice to impart so it's not just a soulless excuse for people to go "hey, that's OG Kevin!" I'm not that writer, but hopefully a good writer reads this and can get a solid idea together to pitch so I can see that movie in my lifetime.
He just has a cool day. Some day drinking. High calorie snacks. Porn on the living room TV. Da works.
And he has early stage parkinsons, with hilarious consequences? I like your thinking, kiddo. you're hired!