this post was submitted on 21 May 2026
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Brand New Sentence

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Showcasing the brazen and nouveau in English communication.

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The Rotisserie Bastard is done with his procedure and ready for pickup (lemmy.today)
submitted 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) by Wren@lemmy.today to c/BrandNewSentence@lemmy.today
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[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 21 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (2 children)

When I was, I dunno maybe 12 or 13, I adopted a stray siamese cat (read: I found it outside and took it home) and named him the stupidest, longest pet name I could think of so his full name on thw vet file was Snowy Diamond Twinkle Marshmallow Fire. We just called him Snowfire for short; though he ended up with the nickname "damn cat" because he was a little shit and got into everything.

My favorite story about Snowfire was he took off for 2 whole years and then came back home like he never even left. IDK where he went, but if he was taken in by other people they left his collar and tags on and never contacted us.

[–] otter@lemmy.ca 13 points 2 days ago

My favorite story about Snowfire was he took off for 2 whole years and then came back home like he never even left. IDK where he went, but if he was taken in by other people they left his collar and tags on and never contacted us.

Time travel

[–] NutinButNet@hilariouschaos.com 2 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago)

Don’t feel bad. I feel like every kid did this or knew someone who did, at least. Most pet names are “dumb” but fun.

My brother named one of our cats “Charlie Brown Milo Smith”, with Smith being our last name. If I remember correctly, we ended up just calling that cat “Kitty Woman”. I feel like that’s the cat and that was her name we called her, if not what my mom called her.

[–] LaunchesKayaks@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Had a cat as a kid that I named Rex. My sister insisted on picking his middle name.... She chose Chicken.

[–] thenextguy@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago

“R.B. We have the meat!”

[–] HumanOnEarth@lemmy.ca 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

So he registered his name as "The Rotisserie Bastard"? Or the place has a goofy system that would say "The Fido is done with his procedure" if the dog's name was Fido?

[–] Wren@lemmy.today 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

They might have thought it was funnier with the "The."

A friend of mine works in pet insurance, frequently texting me some of the insane messages she has to put out. Surprisingly more variations on Hitler than one would expect. Shitler, Pittler, Bitler...

[–] MycelialMass@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago

My wifes cousin had a cat named shitler, he did have a little colored spot below his nosr that looked like a hitler stache though

[–] MutantTailThing@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (3 children)

I know of a guy who named his dog Nathan.

Who the fuck names a dog Nathan

[–] hereiamagain@sh.itjust.works 1 points 1 day ago

My buddy named his dog walter. It fits.

[–] imsufferableninja@sh.itjust.works 3 points 2 days ago

I guess he thought the dog was hot