Programmer Humor

POV: People looking through the comments on my code:

    // This fucking piece of shit right here, I tried like 8 versions of the Library and only this one works which was incompatible with some other shit that's not here anymore

    // and I have no fucking clue why it needs to be divided by 3 but it does even though its supposed to be a memory stream, I have a flag set here if it crashes because I'm just about certain there will eventually be some undefined behavior

   //EDIT 07-15 :  I have commented it out because I noticed everything actually runs fine without it, for now.

    // EDIT 07-18 : Oh actually it appears that the other solution which didn't use to work is now working which is why everything appears to work as long as both solutions to this problem don't simultaneously fail.

    //  EDIT 09-02 : I need to start making comments like "this variable comes from" or "I named it this because" so I know what the fuck I'm looking at.

Trust me, there's someone just starting out, and you got them 90% of the way there, and they will humbly submit a fix for your code with zero judgement.

That someone is me, because I have no idea what I'm doing.

I have written so many scrapers in my life that would have probably helped thousands of people.

it was all for porn though. they shall never see the light of day.

Relatable content.

You want my comment-less source code? I can't be arsed.

Mad respect

Embarrassing*

I'm currently sitting on a codebase that's perfectly ok and I have no reason not to open-source it, but it's 95% generated by AI so I don't know. Probably I'll just use it myself like it was an embarrasing sex toy.

Looking at github lately, it seems a lot of people don't share my reservations.

I don't understand your username. Like that's some kind of exception?

I was reviewing some PowerShell script today and it was absolutely atrocious. It's only saving grace was that it was using actual PowerShell, not some hacky wmic call or anything.

I didn't write it and I'm really glad for that. Whole lines of rewritten code commented out and just left there. Entire lines of # marks. There's no reason this should be so densely commented. Your code should be self explanatory.

There were multiple queries to the same database that was then passed through a "where-object" selector by pipe, looking for a single value (pulling a database of thousands of entries for one line).

It was disgusting.

I'm not even a developer and I thought it was horrid.