You will all be happy to know that I made an appointment with my GP to get psychiatric help. I have made no lies, no delays this time. Just an appointment.

Choosing to do this was the hard part. Showing up to the appointment will be easy. I have a major fear of disappointing authority figures.

After that, it's smooth sailing into the process of being in a waiting list for multiple years.

Matrix update for those who use matrix.org:

https://bsky.app/profile/matrix.org/post/3lxwhw33wms23

The Matrix.org Foundation‬ ‪@matrix.org‬ · 6m Status update: we've restored the 55TB snapshot and subsequent incremental backups, and are about to replay the remaining traffic since the backup. There are still several unknowns, but if things go well the matrix.org instance should be back in 3-4 hours.

Fingers crossed it's back up soon. Tracha Aux is still running. If anyone needs a link my matrix info is in my bio.

Edit: it works now

Mmm 😋 that delicious, consuming negativity is really hitting tonight.

Also re: my list of shit to do, I read 1 out of 3 chapters in my Rust book, didn't do my internet™️ order (can't find what I'm looking for for the life of me), and only half did my resume. Fantastic stuff.

Periodic reminder that Ru Paul's Drag Race went woke apologised for all the shitty transphobic behaviour and routinely features trans and non binary contestants with multiple winners who are trans/non binary, bringing back past contestants who are now trans and non binary etc.

Even past seasons are improved when you know how many contestants are now trans. Jinkx Monsoon won it in season 5 (2013) and started estrogen last year! Adore Delano (runner up season 6) is a trans woman!

Season 9 is a great entry point. At the time it had the first (openly) trans finalist (Peppermint), but now it has in hindsight more trans women (Trinity the Tuck, Valentina, Farrah Moan, Eureka) and Non Binary people (Shea Coulee, Sasha Velour).

They are calling the crystals defective and labeling all its "flaws"! Leave the crystal alone! Poor thing is already a low energy state. If you create even more negative energy, it will become cold and distant.

God damn I dont remember hollow knight being this hard wtf silksong is kicking my ass

Ok but how exactly do the funny Yakuza guys rip their shirt and top off like that, shouldn't they be tearing off the button each time

Big ahh fungus (dried af) growing on fallen tree in europe. My foot for size comparison is there. If anyone knows what it's called, would be appreciated.

As the years passed, Degas became isolated, due in part to his belief that a painter could have no personal life.[28] The Dreyfus Affair controversy brought his anti-Semitic leanings to the fore and he broke with all his Jewish friends.[29] His argumentative nature was deplored by Renoir, who said of him: "What a creature he was, that Degas! All his friends had to leave him; I was one of the last to go, but even I couldn't stay till the end."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edgar_Degas

basically every painter for that time was an absolute shocker just fyi, I've never read about any and found out anything good - ymmv

Finally back to seeing a therapist, we'll see how this one goes for the few months I have access.