EDIT: I've been terribly unclear. We both know she needs counseling. How do I find a counselor? I have never in life even started to search. Also, I'm almost certain our insurance won't cover it. Got so solid advice on a DIY plan. Anyone add to that?
Said I'd never date a jealous woman, married her anyway, eyes wide open. Only real issue, everything else about our relationship outweighs it. But fuck me, it's like a drunk beating his wife and crying he didn't mean to, won't ever do it again. I can be minding my own business and take an ass beating at any moment.
I cannot overstate how bad this is. My PC is in the living room on a 40" TV. Browser pics automatically expand (Imagus extension). I have to be careful to not touch anything with a pretty woman in it. If I switch screens while she's looking, I'm guilty of hiding something.
She goes through my phone, I find apps I never opened. She's checking FB, which I don't touch, only Messenger for Marketplace replies. She's checking my email.
Monster fight last night where she produced a phone pic of my screen with a woman's name and asked why I replied. I didn't. My email address was shown as which account I would be replying from. Whole screen shot: woman's name and my email. Searched all: $womans_name right in front of her. Nada.
Had a recruiter almost score me a sweet job. Wife hated her guts because she's cute and sounded perky. Y'all. The recruiter was in NYC, we're in NW Florida.
I have to lock my PC to take a shit. She would birth live kittens if she saw this post, thinks you people are personal friends, like FB. "These people are strangers, don't even know what fucking country they live in."
She's asked our friends if that's normal. Now I look like a controlling asshole who's hiding something. I have never done this with another partner and have told her that many times.
We've been through this shit three dozen times, and every, single, fucking, time I've proved to her what was up, nothing, she's crying and apologizing, rinse and repeat.
We're 54 BTW, not exactly teenagers.
Anyway, she comes to me today and says she might have a problem and what should she do about it. Fuck I know! Told her to stay the fuck away from me the rest of the day, don't even want to look at her.
How would you reply?
Do you just love weddings? Going for a high score?
Don’t. Marry. Crazy.
You’ve done it three times now. Maybe park the old ring finger for a while, like forever. This is the kind of distrust that should sink a relationship before it gets to the “let’s move in together” level.
She’s crazy suspicious because she knows she’s your third wife. And whatever fucked history shes got, too.
She’s probably coming off previous relationships with lying cheating bastards, so consider that. And therapy.
I have a friend like that (not exact same situation but has been through the ringer several times now, with even more kids) and the first time I tried hard to warn him, to slow him down, but they had a baby on the way and he 'wanted to do the right thing'. Which is noble and all, but that bitch was lazy as shit and crazy as hell. I tried to talk him into at least getting a prenup. Now she sits on her ass all day and spends the child support on her own bullshit, kept the home and the car too. Phones, clothes, shoes, makeup, hair done all the time, you know, the 'important shit'.
Swore up and down that he wouldn't do it again. Take it slow, just getting laid and not getting serious. The idiot was tied again after, shit, a year and a half? Maybe less than that. That shit went up in smoke after about the same amount of time too. Though she was at least not certified crazy, and had her own job. Still had a baby though so hey tack on child support check #2.
Now, a couple years later, I don't think he's married her yet, but they do, again, have a baby on the way. I told him he needs to start stocking up on condoms all over the damn house, but at this point taking him to the vet and getting him snipped is really the best course of action. Baby is due really soon actually. I haven't met #3 yet, so no judgement yet.
He's got issues, and he admits that, and I know that he is taking his fair share of the blame, but damn man you need to stop falling for girls that wear flashing red warning signs, and really needs to jerk it, alone, before making relationship decisions. He's actually drowning in debt because he loves the pussy. My dumbass is drowning in debt trying to save him, and I'm not even getting any.
So yeah, fucking a. Don't marry crazy. Fuck crazy, with a condom that you brought and you put on yourself, but damn guys like this, it's like watching a pileup on the highway during winter, and there's black ice all over the fucking road, and you're at the side of the road with flares trying to warn people, and they just ignore you and smash into the back of the big rig at 90. "how could this happen?" and it's just like, ugh.
You might not like it, but this is what peak evolutionary fitness looks like