this post was submitted on 08 Oct 2025
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No Stupid Questions

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This might be a bit too personal but whatever...

Context is that my last job wasn't exactly great, and it just happened to be when US science was having issues, so I left for a position in EU. Only joined for less than 2 months so still new. Problem is now that I've settled in a bit, issues at the new workplace have been surfacing... I know academia/academic research is known for having "difficult personalities" but this is beginning to get comical. Edit: in both cases it is the supervisor that is toxic; I have nothing against my coworkers. In this case it's referring to what appears to be lots of micromanagement and favoritism, probably some denying of holiday leave that may or may not be legal by the country's employment laws

On one hand I don't want to deal with a bad workplace again just to avoid the toll on my own health (which did happen a lot during the past year). But on the other hand it is nice to have an EU-based position (especially since I'm not an EU citizen so my job is also linked to my ability to stay in a country), and if I got into this situation two-times in a row what's guaranteeing that it won't happen again

I'm... open to all suggestions

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[–] zlatiah@lemmy.world 3 points 3 weeks ago (1 children)

Frankly it helps... your experience tracks with mine as well. I did hear from one colleague that they adopted the Dutch explicit/super-direct communication style and I think it worked for them, so I will give it a shot too. My coworkers are nice so thankfully I believe I will have some ppl to talk to, I'll make sure to do that

Seems most are on the autism spectrum, and that makes it hard to interact with

Funny you mentioned that... I'm Autistic and somehow the worst boss I've had so far was extremely ASD-coded, while the best one I've had was not on the spectrum but super understanding. And yes there are lots of assholes in academia

[–] CompactFlax@discuss.tchncs.de 2 points 3 weeks ago

In response to your edit - micromanaging is standard. It’s super awesome when the PI is telling you how to run a procedure they haven’t run themselves or haven’t done in 10 years. /s

One thing I forgot to mention is that you’ve got people with zero industry experience and zero managerial training walking into their supervisory role on the merit of their educational and research background. They just don’t know (and have the Dunning Kreuger effect in spades) that they’re being managerial jerks. ASD or not. Huge “manage your manager” challenge in academia.

And with ASD, we get into a habit of trying to communicate with neurotypicals and in America especially it’s expected to sugarcoat and kowtow in every communication with the manager but that’s not always a great thing to do with ASD people as you’re aware. Clarity without confrontation is the fine line that you’ll need to walk.